Tuesday, August 24, 2010

Time for another fill...

So, I am going to get a fill today. Probably a fairly small one since I am already at 7.5cc in my 10cc band. I haven't been for a fill in a couple of months so it's due time I think. I am hoping this is the boost I need to get off of this plateau I have been on for months.

I feel like I haven't made even close to the progress I thought I would have 6 months post-op. But it's my own fault for not changing and sticking to it. I didn't realize just how bad my head hunger and food addiction really is until now. It's like crack to me. I wish I was stronger mentally. Some of you have minds like a bull. You just say it and you do it. I, on the other hand, just go back and forth, back and forth. Constant cycle. Binge eating. Losing and gaining.What else?

I keep thinking what is gonna happen when I am filled to max capacity in my band and still haven't hit the sweet spot???? I doubt I should be able to eat a huge slice of lasagna (over 1 cup by itself) and 2...not 1, but 2 garlic cheese toast and have NO problem at 7.5cc's. I am seriously concerned that I have possibly stretched out my pouch. Although some days it's hard to eat lots of foods but I just suffer through the pain and keep eating. Fortunately, I have been lucky enough not to PB every time. In fact that has only happened a handful of times in the last 6 months. I did, however, try to eat a bite of sausage and some potato salad at the benefit on Saturday and after the second bite I was STUCK. I knew it. My mouth started watering and I was holding back PBing so I went to the bathroom quickly (thank goodness there was a bathroom) and stood over the toilet dry heaving about 3 times praying for relief from that awful pain and finally on the fourth try, up it all came. Instant relief. So I didn't attempt to eat until dinner time and guess what I ate? Nachos! Delicious nachos with spicy queso, sour cream, black beans, and ground beef and it was to die for! And yes, that went down just fine. Of course! ha!

Anyhoo....enough rambling! I will post tomorrow for my 6 month bandiversary and we shall see how this fill goes. ***Fingers Crossed***

5 comments:

  1. I feel the same way about the stretched pouch. I can't seem to get past the head hunger. I hope this fill gives you some restriction!

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  2. Wow, I have a 11 cc band and have 8.5 cc in it at this time. I have wondered how full it can get. I have a fill on Friday. Good luck with yours.

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  3. This might sound bonkers but you might want to consider that you have too much restriction and need to give some saline back.

    What you are describing is exactly what I just endured for the last two months. I beat myself up wondering why I was failing the band so miserably and then heartburn kicked in. I gave back 0.2cc's last week and can actually eat again. And now that I can eat again, I am eating better and less of it.

    I learned through all this that the band won't control hunger. It makes it possible to eat less food at a time, when everything is right, but if your body is hungry, band or no band, your body wants food. Trick is to find that balance that lets you eat and also lets you be satisfied on less. I didn't believe it until I went through it, I guess, but if you are getting stuck or pb'ing and it's not just big bites or eating too fast, then you are probably too tight.

    Just some thoughts...

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  4. The band can be frustrating sometimes. I will be trying to eat healthy foods and they get stuff and I have to throw it back up. Then when Im being bad and eat a plate full of mexican food it all goes down fine! I dont understand it either. But I have 7.5 cc's in my 11 cc band and I am pretty close to my sweet spot. Your sweet spot will come! Promise :)

    And you saw my Casey James pictures?! AHHH Love him!! He was my favorite on Idol last year and he was amazing in concert and so freaking fine! We got to meet him and talk to him after the show...I felt like a little 3rd grade girl with a crush! He is handsome!!

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  5. Just wanted to lend some support as you have shown me the last couple weeks. I'm afraid I can't offer much advice as I'm brand spankin' new to this whole band thing but I agree with what some others have said. I've heard that the larger bands - 10 or 11 cc's - most don't reach restriction until they are close to 8 and even then even .1 or .2 cc's can make a big difference. Hang in there!

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Thanks for the comment! Appreciate it!