Riddle me this, Batman...

Holy Toledo!!!! Ok...I realize that at this point I should only be a able to eat like what, a cup of food??? Right? Ok I get the whole bandster hell thing but it is still soooo very discouraging to know that I can still eat like King Kong and it's freaking me the hell out! So this is what I had for lunch today...

Minus the drink, oh and only about 10 times that size!!!!!!!!!!! And still managed to scarf down like 5 bites of Mary's baked potato! WTF???? How is this possible? I mean dang there is 4 cc's in there right now! Has my band totally slipped and my stoma is like huge now or what? I just can't for the life of me seem to figure out how all this food fits easily through the hole in there! No problem, adios, buh-bye you giant mound of food cuz I am eating you! No stuck no problem! Please, Lord, let the fill on Friday do something!!!! Oh and then I thought about that too today that this is upcoming appt on Friday is not technically a "fill appt" it is a post op follow up. So what if the doc won't give me a fill???? Surely when I tell him I can eat all of pizza hut and still have room for a cookie he will feel for me and say yes, dear, a fill, coming right up! Right? Won't he? I don't know I am in la la land right now. I just hope I don't fail myself! Does that make sense? I must sound like one flew over the coo coo's nest right now. Ah well just thought I'd throw down some frustration AGAIN today! Have a good day everyone!

Hmmm...yeah just hmmm....

So I am a bit down today for several reasons but mainly because I can feel that all of my old cravings have returned and I am addicted to carbs again. It's all I think about when I am making food choices is the carbs. I have eaten cheese enchiladas, rice, beans, chips, dip, more chips, and tons more. I know I can eat it and that I won't get stuck now and I am just completely like I was before the band was ever a thought, back in my vicious cycle. Also today was weigh day and guess what???? I am back to 193lbs!!!! That's what I weighed the day of surgery so technically I have made no progress in the entire post op month. GREAT!!!! And I am not stupid as to why this has happened. I know what I am doing. I haven't been eating AS MUCH as I used to before the band but the same old devil carbs have crept their way back in and now that's all I really want. I have yet to eat pasta though, surprising because it's my #1 carb other than bread that I have always been addicted to. Damn me!!!!! Also, this is a lil graphic sounding but my stupid incisions are on my last nerve! I followed the nurses orders and have been using Neosporin AROUND the incisions to get rid of this red rashiness. Well I looked at them at my desk today and the port incision now has tiny lil antbite-like bumps around it. Before there were bumps but now they have lil heads on them just like an antbite or tiny pimple. I don't get it??? What in the hell will fix this mess???? It's funny cuz that's what is making my incisions look bad not the incision itself. That's healing just fine but the glue has messed up my skin. I hate to have to wait until Friday when I go for my fill to do something about it because I don't want to scar worse as Sandy Lee said but dang, I don't want to make a special 45 min trip to see them and then have to do it again Friday. UGH!!! Why cruel world why????

Just a sad day for this puppy!

Another baby boy!!!

Ok...unfortunately I only have a short moment to post something but I just had to share the latest arrival. A good friend that I work with also a Jessica, just had her baby boy yesterday! We have worked together through her whole pregnancy and I am sooo very happy for her. She named her son Gavin.

Also, we have a kind of festival here in the town where I work and they have all kinds of booths with jewelry and stuff to buy and food stands, etc etc etc. Well this year they had a white tiger attraction and you could go in the tent and see the female and male tigers and pay extra to take a picture of you feeding them throught he cages. So of course I had to feed the kitties! :) Check it out!

That's all folks!

One Month Bandiversary!!!!

Yes, I know it's gone by crazy fast but today makes a month since my surgery. It seems like just yesterday, Oh how time flies. My hubby's sister and her husband just had their baby boy yesterday. I went up to see them at the hospital after work yesterday and he is absolutely adorable. Check him out below. :) His name is Landyn. Isn't he just the cutest thing? Kinda makes me want a baby but nah, I will wait for a couple more years.

On a less pleasing note, I am beyong annoyed with the whole "eating" mess. I have vowed to myself at the start of every morning that I will be good and eat high protein, low carb and by lunch time I have nothing prepared and off I go to Taco Bell or calling in not-so-good-for-me orders at some restaurant. I can't wait to have an electric stove now and able to cook good meals and try different recipes and stuff. Oh BTW, I don't know if I said anything about this yet but I am moving into a different trailor this weekend. It is only 3 minutes down the road from where we live now but we get along better with the new landlords and they fixed the place up just for us (new tile floor, fresh paint, new vanity and bathtub, etc etc etc). I think it will be a good change. It's always fun moving into a new place don't ya think?  And a major perk? The kitchen is alot bigger and everything is ELECTRIC! No more propane for us! The place we live now has a gas stove and gas heater and I refuse to spend a minimum of $200 to have it filled like twice a year so I have not used a stove in about 3 years! :) I know some of you are like WTH? That's nuts but it's true. I bet your asking "well how do you keep cozy in the winter Jessica? Well lemme tell ya, those lil oscilating heaters at Wal-mart work wonders and save on the electric! We have one in our living room and one in the bedroom and they work just as well if not better than central heat! Heck we might still use those during the winter! :)
I know I have completely gone on rambling off topic...I told ya'll I think too much! Let's see what else???

OH YEAH, did anyone else have issues with bruising easily after surgery??? I have always bruised easy on my arms but that's about it and I have bruises all over my legs and arms and some of them I just find and I am like how the heck did that happen???? And these aren't tiny bruises either take a look here's a few...

Scary huh? I started taking B Complex liquid drops and calcium chews because I don't know what the heck is up with this! And my incisions are still itching like crazy and still have those tiny red itchy bumps everywhere. I think the incisions look ok but I just feel like they should be more healed than they are. I don't think there's an infection at all but it's just not as far along as I thought it would be after 4 weeks.

What do ya think? You can kinda see the lil red bumps around them. And my burn mark that I should totally sue them for!

and to end my b*tching I will leave you with a puppy of the day! Adorable! :)

In the land of the i-phone! yippeeeee

Hola people! Hope your weekends were stupendous.....mine sucked for reasons I won't go into...just know that it sucked and I hope my life perks up soon people, or I might actually be in a padded cell one day. Isn't that just the cutest lil chi chi. I love the pink and pearls.
Well one star in my sky is that I am FINALLY getting my i-phone today. I have been stuck with a not-so-bad flip phone that is pretty much ancient compared to the technology that's out there now (no offense to you ancient flip phone lovers!) I have had it for almost 2 years and I am finally due for an upgrade! YAY! I get on the net on my phone alot so this will be a sweet change. Also I am going to go shopping for a couple pairs of slacks for work because the ones I have on are falling off of me, literally! I wanted to keep them as long as possible but they are looking pretty ridiculous.

Also! Yes there's another star in my sky (maybe it could form the lil dipper or something) I know if you've been following my blog that I have been super ticked that my weight keeps going up 2 lbs down 1 lb up 1 lbs down 2 lbs...really annoying. Well as of this morning I am at 190.2! I weighed like 3 days ago and I weighed 193. Soooo I am totally setting a mini goal this week to get into the 180's. What's funny is if ya look at me you would think I am even lower than that but the inches are coming around more than the pounds. I bet 10 people at work passed by and told me that I am getting sooo skinny. hehe...I see it but I don't think I am even near skinny yet. But it still is nice that other people are noticing too and I am not just dilusional. hehe

Here's another tiny star...I will get off of work in like 30 minutes. That's always a plus in my book. (Just thought I'd throw that in there) Here is a pic of me from today at work in front of some blinds. Nothing special just thought I'd throw a 3 1/2 weeks post op full length pic out there! :)

Back to the Basics

Last night I decided that I am freaking out! I realized that I am able to eat...eat....eat. It was my hubby's BDAY yesterday. I planned yesterday to do my Protein and veggies all day. Well I thought that was the plan...at lunch time I was in the protein frame of mind and all and so I decided to order grilled shrimp that came with a small bowl of pinto beans. Well just as I was almost done ordering I noticed they had FRIED PICKLES!!!!! I love fried pickles and I have been craving them like crazy for about 2 weeks now. My friend that works with me likes them too and she said she would share them with me. So OF COURSE, I mindlessly ordered them. Well I ate the shrimp, the coleslaw they mistakenly gave me (I wanted my beans!) and about 5 fried pickles. Now take into consideration that on a normal basis I could have devoured at least half of that container (like 50 pickles...yes they load ya up here in Texas) and I can't do it now so that is one plus. On the other hand, carbs, carbs, carbs! Bad!!!! Then we went to a steak and seafood restaurant for the hubby's bday and I couldn't find anything on the menu. It was between fish (I hate fish) and a steak and shrimp deal for $26.99!!!! Cheapest steak they had, ridiculous. So I again..mindlessly...ordered fried crawfish tails (for those of you who have never had these down south...they are the BEST!) and french fries. And guess what???? I ate all of my fries and about 5 or 6 crawfish tails and then 1 small bite of the Oreo Mousse cake I bought for the hubby. heheehehehehehehe I could just smack myself. I also drank tea while eating which is a NO NO! And if that wasn't bad enough I got hungry a few hours later and ate doritos and salsa while watching TV. And through all of these "wonderful" decisions yesterday, I had no problems consuming any of this. No "band full" feeling, no gas pain, no pressure, NOTHING! I did get fuller faster than I used to but the restriction has gone down tremendously. SCARY thing to realize. I sure don't want to gain back the weight I have lost so far. So I decided I am going to try my damndest to do like I did on the pre op diet and do one shake a day and 2 high protein and veggie meals with as little carbs as possible. Soooo today I have done better and so far...
Breakfast: Hot green tea and 1 splenda and ONE Atkins protein shake (chocolate royale...delicious)
Lunch: 1 lean ground beef patty, 1 slice of tomato, 6 pickles, and 2 romaine lettuce leafs. I broke it all up and made a lettuce wrap out of it...and it was absolutely YUMMY! Oh and I had one tbsp of mayo
So far so good.

Ok now for the lovely lil game Drazil came up with....Below are her questions:

1. If you could be a weather forecast, what would you be and why?

I would be Slight chance of rain and thunderstorms because I am very moody and being a Gemini I go back and forth and there is always a chance of rain with me. Also, I actually enjoy the rain. I have never disliked the rain as long as I am not out having to run errands in it. Rain and thunder are very soothing to me and it rains alot here so it feels like home.

2. If you could be a crayon, what color would you be and why?

This one is tough for me too because I love many colors. But if I had to pick one I would probably be silver because Silver can go with almost anything and I wear it alot. I like shades of gray and silver is in that family so there ya go!

3.  What is/was your biggest physical goal you want to do when you hit your goal weight?

I would love to run a 1/2 marathon. I HATE running because I suck at it so I know if I ever was able to do a marathon that I have improved drastically and it would be a major accomplishment. AND I have always been interested in trying out hiking. We shall see.

4. If you could be any animal, what would it be and why?

I would be an monkey because they are very intelligent, can live as long as humans, and are cute as heck! :)

5. Put it out there, black and white Stat Questions:

What is your highest weight? 206lbs
What is your weight now:?191.2 as of this morning
What is your goal weight? 135-140
What is your goal size? Umm I would say a 6 or 8
What diet/program/tool do you follow/have if any? I am trying to follow high protein, low carb diet and I have the band as my tool :)
How did you lose the weight current to today? Low carb, high protein has always worked for me. I just needed help with the portion control part and for cravings

6. What's your best advice for people on this weight loss journey?

Believe in yourself...corny I know...but you just have to honestly believe that it is possible to be the size you want to be. It's not impossible by any means but you have to work for it. There's no miracle pill, diet, or surgery. You have to work for it and you can have it! Good luck!

7. Have you ever shaved your whootananny?

I particularly love this question, Drazil. You and Amy just crack me up! Ok. we all know you really want people to answer and you are just trying to seem modest by saying you don't sooo.....dun dun dun....
My answer is...who hasn't???? HAHAHA

Happy St. Patrick's Day and Sugar Doll Award!

Happy St. Patty's Day everyone!!!! I don't think I have ever said this before but I am Irish and proud of it! I love Irish heritage and culture and I even have a tattoo of 3-3 leaf clovers on my right foot to prove it. :) I hope you all are wearing your green today!

Well the BFF, Mary, should be in recovery right about now. She was banded today and I am soooo happy for her. Hoorah, Hoorah, Hoorah! Let's all keep her in our thoughts that all has gone well and the road to recovery will be a smooth one!

Ok! I am sooooo thrilled that I found a special surprise this morning! I got my FIRST award from BG and I couldn't be more flattered! :) yipee!

This is THE FABULOUS SUGAR DOLL AWARD. This award is to be given to 5 bloggers who make your life sweeter! Here are the rules for this Blog Award.

1. Thank the Person who gave you this award.


Thank you so much BG at The Sweet Spot for thinking of me! I enjoy being a part of your journey and that you are a part of mine! Thanks for the advice and generosity!
2. Give to 5 bloggers and write why they have made your life a lil sweeter.

Kristen at Kristen's Lapband Journey Reading her blog was why I decided to start my own! Very inspirational. Thanks girl!

Amy at Once upon a time....in the land of cheese and sunkist Her blog is so interesting and full of inspiration to me. Not to mention she's one funny chica!

Sandy Lee at The Weight Loss Rollercoaster for always giving me fabulous advice and comments and she is super sweet.

Drazil at It's just Me, Drazil and Sheniqua for having some very interesting posts that I must honestly say I have got a good chuckle out of a time or two.

and Last but Certainly not least Mary at Big Girls Don't Cry for being the best friend anyone could wish for and as a congrats on her becoming a fellow bandster today! May your journey rock! Love ya sista! xoxo
3. Write why you where given this award.

BG said It was in honor of those newbies out there and those who are about to get banded. Her exact words "She's three weeks post-op now too and is fighting the carb monster!" hehehe



4. Tell the other bloggers you gave them this award.

Well this is going on my new trophy wall on my blog! yipee! Onto another note...I am 3 weeks post op and able to start solid foods today! Yipee....I am sticking to my high protein and low carb and I MEAN IT! So today I have had
B drink: hot green tea, skim milk, splenda
Breakfast: Dannon Light and Fit yogurt with protein powder
Lunch: chicken salad w/ 1 tbsp of light mayo and 1 cup of mixed greens (not bad, actually)
Dinner: Steak and broccoli...yum yum yum
Water in between and possibly a s/f jello for dessert!

That's all I have for now....oh wait....I almost forgot! All of my glue is off of my incisions now, even the port incision. They are healing nicely. Only one problem...the red itchy lil bumps surrounding them all. I know it is a reaction to the glue because I get the same thing when I take bandaids off. So I called the doc and they told me that I could put some hydracortizone cream on the itchy part and it will go away! Other than that I am right on track! Now let's see if these pounds start coming off.

Oh the tangled web...

First...Mary is getting banded TOMORROW!!!!! yipee!!!! I am soooo happy for her and I know everything will go super well for her.

Second....This must be a quick post. I am already off of work and haven't been able to get on here today to read everyone's blogs or barely look at my own. Gosh, busy day. So I thought I would do a tiny zinger. Well my menu today isn't any better than it has been. I mean I realize that my calories are still under 1000 but I know all the carbs and fat aren't helping me out at all not to mention I do not look forward going through carb withdrawals again like I did on the pre-op diet but it is well worth it in the end. :) Yes I have noticed that I am getting sluggish upon waking in the mornings again. Towards the end of my pre op and then the first 2 weeks after surgery I noticed that waking up got alot easier than it has been for me in years. I am not a morning person but I found myself waking easily and on my own sometimes. Now I am getting drowsy again and I know it's connected to all these carbs!!! Damn those tasty lil carbs! Here's the mess so far!
Morning drink: Hot green tea with splenda and skim milk
Breakfast: Instant grits
Lunch: I got brave and got a mexican pizza from TACO BELL!!!! That is my favorite thing ever and I love them and I used to eat taco bell religiously (literally like 10 times a week) before my pre op. So I was addicted to it and I realized I haven't eaten there in over a month sooooo....I thought, why not? I usually get a mex pizza AND 2 taco supremes, AND a cheese rollup, AND a large baja blast!!! I am supposed to be moving to soft/semi-regular food starting tomorrow. So I am back in the game!
Dinner: I am having some refried beans and 1 enchilada (yum)

Don't worry...I won't be eating like this daily! I do believe this is what a typical "fun" day will consist of now. Remember my whole 6 days good, 7th day a treat??? yeah I am calling the 7th day "fun day" now. Cuz it is fun to indulge. I know I REALLY enjoyed that mexican pizza. It was DELICIOUS! But I didn't go overboard like I always do. So there's my posititve for the day. Wow this supposedly short post...is once again...longer than I expected...hehe Sorry! Gosh I love to babble. Ok seriously I will leave you again with a puppy of the day. This picture reminds me of how I feel when I eat too much! Enjoy!

Old Habits die Hard, Hard, Hard!

I was very, very bad this weekend! I deserve a major whoopin' and my guilt is getting me! So here goes, I have noticed (as everyone said I would) that I am able to eat more and more at each meal. I still have restriction (thank goodness) but not as much as I did the first 2 weeks. I know the swelling in my stomach has gone down and it's giving me a lil more room to work with. I am getting beyond sick of soups and I just can't get the hang of the whole mushy foods thing. I basically am still doing thick liquids cause I feel like the mushy is pointless. I don't want chicken/tuna salad by itself. I like to eat that with crackers, chips, or bread and I can't have any of that so I don't want it period. It doesn't sound appealing to me. I can have mashed potatoes but I don't feel like it. So the only thing I have really started that is mushy is my grits in the morning and then my refried beans with cheese and salsa (getting sick of it after eating it 3 days in a row).

Soooo.....my boredom got the best of me. It all started Friday night when MARY (yes, blaming her hehe) had this great idea that if I am allowed mushies now that I could probably get away with eating a couple Jack in the Box tacos and just getting rid of the hard shell part and eating the mushy innards. When she first thought of this days before my initial reaction was "NO! I am not eating that, it's loaded with fat and calories!" hehe well needless to say I got over that and I got 2 tacos AND....a big AND 3 stuffed jalapeno peppers!!!!! I only planned on eating one of those and I did only eat one but still! The soft part of the tacos and the pepper went down just fine. No problems....I felt shame! Then....on Saturday night I was starving and I had no soup on hand and I was having issues with the hubby so I was kinda down and decided I would like another 2 tacos from Jack in the Crack. So we went there and I got the 2 tacos AGAIN AND...a big AND... potato wedges with cheese and bacon. So I ate the soft part of the tacos and 1/3 of the wedges and again it went fine. I did have a lil sick feeling an hour later but it lasted a very short time. And again Shame....

And now today, for lunch, Mary wanted to go to lunch at Jax again and they have the best steak fries in the world so what did I do???? I ordered the potato soup AND...there's that damn and again.....steak fries! I ended up eating all but 3 fries and half of my soup. That was honestly, a lil painful for about 20 minutes. But other than that, no stuck, no problem!!!!! And the reason I say old habits die hard is because upon doing all of this it isn't for hunger...it's for my head. I know I have restriction because I really can tell when I am actually hungry now. Which is a plus because before I confused my boredom for hunger. But now I know when my tummy is growling and I feel empty that I am hungry. So I happy for that. But I am getting brave with the band and I wish I wasn't. I keep testing it. I promised myself I wouldn't do that and really you couldn't have paid me to do that the first week!

I can't wait until Wednesday when I can start eating semi-normal again. My plan is to eat 6 days a week really well. High protein, low carb and then on day 6 or 7 I can treat myself to a small portion of 2 things I really really want that's not so healthy. Even my doc recommended that to keep yourself from feeling deprived of your fav foods. Also my hubby and I are moving into a new home and will have a stove. (we have a stove now but it's propane and I don't like it so I don't use it!) I will have more options to cook and try new recipes...how exciting....well I am babbling on and on and on....So thanks, if you are still reading.
I realize that my band is a tool. I know I am going to use it well soon, I just am getting so discouraged that my weight has not changed. I know some of you told me that you stalled in the beginning too and that it will pick up eventually and I know it will....it's just unsettling when you keep seeing the scale go up a pound and down 2 pounds and up 3 pounds and down 3 pounds. GRRRRR.....

Also, I took some before pictures in a bikini of mine. I will not post them until I have some AFTER pics! hehehe...so coming soon, hopefully.

Just Because...

I really don't have anything interesting to talk about today, besides the fact that my BFF Mary, that I have mentioned before, just started her own blog today so that she can track her band journey as well. She is getting banded next week on the 17th and is super excited!
Check out her blog at http://maryannchange.blogspot.com/ and feel free to join on her journey!

Also, I am STILL annoyed that I haven't lost any weight. I am stuck at stupid 191-192! I am super p-o-ed at this matter. Seriously????!!!!! Oh, it better change on solids cuz this sucks!

Ok and for a final note...here is the puppy of the day! A baby bulldog! Isn't he cute?

Stuck.....sucks!

So as I said last night, I decided to eat beans, cheese, and salsa (absolutely delicious!!!!) and I even cheated a little and had a couple crispy pita chips with it (chewed up really good) and it was fantastic! Every bite bursting with flavor and what not and then suddenly I realized that the 4 oz maximum I was supposed to eat had turned into like 7 oz! I felt ok until I put my plate in the trash and then it hit me!!! STUCK PAIN! Oh my goodness. I absolutely do NOT like that expanding, shooting, nauseous pain that it causes. I can see how someone would quickly learn their lesson and not overeat! It passed after about 10 minutes but it sucked while it lasted.

Haha and for those of you who do not know what malt-o-meal is, it is like cream of wheat (a hot breakfast cereal) haha that was pretty funny! I like to add sugar or splenda and a lil butter to mine and it is to die for!

Also I have a photo update of my incisions that I took yesterday, exactly 2 weeks post op. You can really see in this one the swelling that I still have but believe me it has gone down since last week.  Plus I am laying down on the couch so it is a lil less stretched out than my original incision photo from the day after surgery cuz all my fat is weighed down by gravity! hahaha Also the dermabond glue around them has not fallen off at all so the glue is starting to turn yellowish from getting old. But all in all I think it's healing well. Can't wait til there completely done.

I also took a face shot of myself yesterday to see if my face looks any thinner. It turned out pretty cute I think. I made it my new profile picture but I can definitely see a difference in my cheeks compared to the older picture.

Oh yeah! hehe

Well I don't really have anything interesting to talk about today so I guess this will be it for now!

Week 3: Mush, Mush, Mush!

So I get to start mushies today. I went to the store last night and got me some grits, malt-o-meal, Idaho potato flakes (love em'), more pudding, more soups, tuna, chicken in a can, applesauce, etc. And my favorite that I will be enjoying the heck out of tonight would be my refried beans, salsa, and cheese! Oh yes! This, plus sour cream, used to be something I knoshed on as a kid on a weekly basis! Anyhoo...for boring's sake I just thought I would shoot out my menu for today if anyone would care to have an idea of what I will be eating for the next week!
Breakfast Drink: Hot green tea with a dash of skim milk and 2 splendas and my 2 chewy vitamins
Breakfast: Grits (yummy)
Drink: Apple juice
Lunch: Cream of chicken and mushroom soup with a 1/2 cup of skim milk for some thickness.
Snack: Dannon Light N' Fit yogurt (cherry)
Dinner: fat-free refried beans, 2 oz shredded cheese, and 2 tbsp salsa all blended up
Snack: sugar-free pudding (chocolate and vanilla swirl)
And like 4 bottles of water mixed in there throughout the day! ;P

Also, I think I felt my first "stuck" feeling last night. I was having creamy baked potato soup from one of my fav small town restaurants, Jax, and I added a few pieces of bacon and a tiny bit of cheese. Well I have eaten this soup several times on my thick liquids week and I also LOVE pita chips with sea salt on them. Well I had a bag of them on the counter and I decided last night that would have a couple of them as long as I chewed them really well and drank soup with them so it thinned the mush out after chewing. Well I had no problems and then after I was finished I stood up from the table and had a terrible shooting pain in my back, under my left rib, and it traveled up into my shoulder like lightning!!!! It lasted a few minutes and I sat on the bed and felt almost like being a lil sick and then it went away! Is that what stuck is supposed to feel like? cuz it was kinda scary for a minute!
Tell me about your first stuck experience!

Ok on to better topics...So I think the yearbook pic was a hit and I thought I would post a couple more that I did and my favorite of my hubby.

Me in 1964...wow! haha

The DJ Tanner look from 1992

Ryan in 1954! My sexy stud muffin. Meow!

He hehe!!! I love those things. Anywayz I don't know if anyone noticed but I love puppies, especially chi chi's. So here is my puppy of the day! Enjoy...

 

Down the rabbit hole...???

Ok so I forgot to mention that I went and saw Alice in Wonderland 3D on Saturday! It was ....hmm...interesting. Very strange! I only saw it because I just love Johnny Depp! I don't think I will be watching this one again!

Oh and my friends have been asking me to name my band! So I decided to name HER Lexi....I like that name, it's classy. Wouldn't it be nifty if I named my first daughter Lexi too? After all, I won't be able to have kids until I get this weight off thanks to my PCOS and all so I will be able to thank my band when that time comes. :)

I decided I should post a few random pics, too!

The jacuzzi at the Crowne Plaza Hotel

we stayed at during my surgery! It was very warm!

My hubby's new Chevy Silverado we just got last month

My sister Lori and I in the hotel room the night before my surgery

Fancy pants getting a bath! She hates bath time.

The date on the pic is wrong! hehe This was sometime in January.

Me last summer going swimming. I burn easily! Hopefully

I will have some full length after pics here in a couple of months!

Me and how I would have looked in 1978!

I love this pic! hehe Go to the website and check it out!

It's lots of fun you can put your picture in tons of different years.

Hiatal Hernia????!!!!!

Ok. So ya know how I said was having trouble breathing after the band? For the first week I was so short of breath when talking/walking it was weird and I chalked it up to being extra gas in me that was maybe compressing my lungs or something. Well after a week I called the surgery center to ask if it was normal and they said that I shouldn't be having that much trouble breathing just because of gas pains and that if it continued I should come in and see them. So I went out and researched a bit on the net about shortness of breath after lap band and found that alot of people who had hiatal hernias repaired during surgery had this shortness of breath after......well I thought and thought and remembered that the day of surgery when I first came out of anesthesia and they just got me and about to go do the barium swallow test that I had heard the my doctor telling someone that he had repaired a hernia. Of course, I was soooo out of it and going in and out of focus that I assumed he was talking to someone else in post op and didn't think nothing of it and actually completely forgot about that moment until I started reading this thing. So I thought, what if he was talking to ME!!!????
I called them today and asked the post op nurse to pull my chart and see if I had hernia repair during surgery and guess what????? She called me back and said I sure did! So I had a hernia and didn't even know it and then forgot that the doctor told me I had one!!!!! Holy mess! Crazy huh? So that explains my shortness of breath and the pain I STILL have when I breathe in deeply. Also my tummy is still swollen in the port area and they said the hernia repair can cause a bit of extra swelling. Soooo there is is? And it also explains all the pain I have had for years under my ribcage and the reflux! Heck I thought I had IBS, gallstones, etc forever I was self diagnosing myself...lol and the whole time it was a dang hernia! Who'd a thunk it? hehe Well I am super glad it was fixed! yay! And I am feeling much better and almost back to normal.

Oh my incisions are itching like crazy today!!!!!!!!! And my glue on them hasn't even budged a bit! I can't believe it will be on there for another 4 weeks!

Now onto heavier subjects...I am a little discouraged. I will be able to start mushies on Wednesday but I haven't lost any more weight! I am just hovering between 191 and 192. Heck I weighed 193 the day of surgery so technically I have only lost like 1 pound since surgery? WTF???? I don't get it! I have been following my post op diet to the letter and I know I don't get more than like 500 calories a day! Is my metabolism shot or what???? I have noticed a difference in my clothes and they are getting loose but I expected a good size weight loss post op! Anyone else have these issues? What happened, did the weight loss pick up once solids foods came back? Just trying to figure out what to expect!

Week 2: Thick Liquids!

I am feeling much better today. My feelings began to improve yesterday after I had my tortilla soup broth. It was very difficult not to eat the contents in the soup as I absolutely love the mexican cheeses, jalapenos, tortilla strips, and chicken. It's to die for! But I was good and only had the clear broth. I did however test myself a tiny little bit. My husband had ordered a bowl of the most delicious queso and jalapenos for the chips. I wanted just one chip terribly so I got one medium sized tortilla chip and dipped a tiny lil piece of it in some salsa and chewed it until it was basically liquid and swallowed and followed each tiny lil bite with some unsweet tea just to make sure it was going down and to my surprise, I had no problems. And I was satisfied with the one chip and my broth! :) yay Afterwards those awful hunger pangs disappeared and the rest of the night was pretty good for me. This is what I have eaten today so far:
First thing: Hot herbal tea sweetened with 1/2 packet of Splenda
Breakfast: Gerber baby food (tropical medley) and I added a tbsp of unflavored whey protein powder (oh it was delicious!!!)
Lunch: Campbells Soup at Hand Creamy Chicken and again I added a tbsp of whey protein. (Very yummy)
For dinner: I will probably have some V8 Broccoli soup with some whey in it as well.

When I get off I wanna go buy the Dannon Light N' Fit yogurt smoothies (I am allowed those now as well)

Did anyone start drinking skim milk on the thick liquids phase???? I have read on certain sites that it is allowed now but it's not on the list the doc gave me. I dunno what it would hurt unless they are worried about intolerance still.
Anyhoo! Feeling pretty good today and I am happy about that.

Having some issues...

Thanks everyone for the comments on my last post! I am trying to hang in there. Sometimes I get so discouraged at night though when I get home because my back hurts sooooo BAD! I feel like I just got hit by a truck. I do have a desk job so I don't do any heavy lifting or too much walking, so that's a plus but I just don't feel like I am where I should be pain wise. I mean I have been reading some other banders' experiences and it seems like I shouldn't be feeling this badly. Tomorrow makes one week post op and I just don't feel well. I realize that my lack of calories is probably the contributing factor to my fatigue and tiredness. These hunger pangs are what is driving me insane now. I mean I feel like my insides are just turning cannibal and eating me. I am relieved that I can begin my thick liquids tomorrow, though. I am hoping that some extra calories will help relieve this God awful empty feeling I have. What's crazy is I have no appetite (head wise) but my body is just screaming for food. I am still having gas pain in my back and now I have the whole growling stomach thing non-stop. I find it difficult to drink that amount of water that I am supposed to. I am sick of drinking everything and I just want nothing. UGH! I will be soooo glad when this gets better.

Also, I feel like my stomach is still very swollen and I can't tell if my incisions look too good. The picture I posted of them on my last post was the day after surgery and to me they look more bruised now, especially below the port incision. Is that normal? Oh and also, I noticed today that I have a tiny little bit of clear fluid on my port incision. It's a very small amount but I am freaking out! I called the nurse at the center and asked and they said that a small amount is normal as long as the incision doesn't start opening up or feels hot. Well It looks closed to me and there is no fever in any of my incisions but I just don't know. I am scared. Also, Ladies, when did you start wearing a bra again???? I have been wearing camisols under my tops to hide stuff. I am afraid to wear a bra because my incisions are so close to where the underwire would be.

Today is my little sister, Shelby's birthday. She is 11 now and me and the hubby are meeting my fam after work at one of my favorite mexican restaurants to celebrate and I am excited because I will be ordering tortilla soup (my favorite!!! yum) and be able to drink the broth and maybe if I really mush up the avovado in it with a fork I can have a few bites of that. YAY! I am looking forward to that. It is amazing how much you really start to appreciate food when you can't have any at all! :P

6 days POST OP

Well, finally, I am back at work and able to talk a bit. Ok, first off, thanks everyone for your encouragement and comments on my last post. I was quite nervous. So much has happened since my last post. Let's see. My surgery date was last Wednesday Feb 24th! My mother, stepdad, little sister, and I rented a hotel room 5 minutes from the surgical center the night before my surgery because my arrival time was scheduled for 7:30am and with traffic that would have taken us like an hour and a half to get there. So we rented the room for 2 nights so that I would be close after surgery in case I needed to go back.

Arrival: My stepdad dropped me off at the center and I wore PJ's and some cute slippers. The pre-op nurse brought me into pre-op and weighed me and I officially lost 13lbs on the pre-op diet!!!!! yay for me! They were very pleased with that. I got into my hospital gown and she got my IV started and then I waited for an hour.
Surgery: They gave me a something in my IV that made me totally loopy as they wheeled me into the OR. I had these pressure cuff things on my legs to help prevent blood clots and stuff and then I had to slide over onto the OR bed and they tied my arms in the foam holders and then gave me some anesthesia and I was out like a light. I think I might have taken like 2 breaths before my lights were out!
Post-op: I woke up in the post-op area and I remember I had an oxygen mask on and I felt very panicky and I was in lots of pain. The nurse saw I was awake and took the mask off of me. It was very hard to breathe for me because of the excruciating pain in my back, chest, and shouder from all the trapped air in my system. She helped me get dressed and gave me some ice chips and some pain medicine. Then I had to stand up and walk into another room and do a barium swallow to make sure everything was going down ok. I was totally out of it. It was VERY hard for me to stay awake. They put me in the recovery room and handed me a bottle of water to begin drinking. I think they took my vitals a few times. Then my family showed up and I saw them and the nurse kept making me try to walk but I felt soooo nauseous when I would walk. But eventually I got the hang of it and felt a tiny better and they let me go. Apparently my doctor gave me a 4cc fill already when he put the band in. So I am ahead of the game a bit, I guess.
We went back to the hotel room and I was so exhausted and short breathed that I just fell in the bed and passed out. My mom went out to get me a few things from Walgreens and I basically slept on and off all night long. But I woke up every hour or so to walk for a couple of minutes. I was extremely sore and uncomfortable. I don't wanna scare anyone who hasn't done this yet but it was not at all what I expected. Much more difficult to deal with. The gas pains are immense!!!! I have never felt pain like this before. My stomach didn't hurt so much except trying to get up and sit down/lay down. It kinda felt like I had done 1000 situps or crunches. Then by day 3 my back was killing me because I used my back so much to get up and down and do everything that my muscles were screaming! The trapped air has made it very difficult to breathe deeply so I was given an incentive spirometer to use several times a day for a week to improve my breathing.

I am now 6 days post op and each day is getting a lil better at a time. My soreness is less and my back feels a lil better and it's not as hard to breathe. My only issue I am still dealing with is the gas pain. When I drink too much or too fast I have this awful pain rise up through my chest and into my shoulder like I need to burp badly but I am unable to so it just sits there and finally goes away. It is very uncomfy. I have lost 3lbs since surgery according to the scale this morning.

Liquids post op: So the first week I have been allowed 2 protein shakes a day and also I can have clear, thin liquids. I am sooooo DISGUSTED with these chocolate and strawberry protein shakes that I could vomit just thinking about them. So I came up with an idea today and I am going to go and buy the unflavored egg white protein powder and some V8 or pureed soups and add it to that as my protein shake. I am so sick of sweet stuff! Then on Wednesday I can start my thick liquids and have lil texture. So I will by some creamier soups and some baby food! yay can't wait!

Whew I have said alot! Sorry there's soooo much to read. I am including a picture of my incisions. I took this the day of my surgery. Not too bad even though the squiggly line is actually a burn from the laser they used. I just love that! Hopefully it doesn't scar too bad. It's not painful at all! My stomach is still very swollen and I can't wait til that goes down back to normal. It just pooches out right now. Aww well...I am keeping my head up!