Monday, March 29, 2010

Hmmm...yeah just hmmm....

So I am a bit down today for several reasons but mainly because I can feel that all of my old cravings have returned and I am addicted to carbs again. It's all I think about when I am making food choices is the carbs. I have eaten cheese enchiladas, rice, beans, chips, dip, more chips, and tons more. I know I can eat it and that I won't get stuck now and I am just completely like I was before the band was ever a thought, back in my vicious cycle. Also today was weigh day and guess what???? I am back to 193lbs!!!! That's what I weighed the day of surgery so technically I have made no progress in the entire post op month. GREAT!!!! And I am not stupid as to why this has happened. I know what I am doing. I haven't been eating AS MUCH as I used to before the band but the same old devil carbs have crept their way back in and now that's all I really want. I have yet to eat pasta though, surprising because it's my #1 carb other than bread that I have always been addicted to. Damn me!!!!! Also, this is a lil graphic sounding but my stupid incisions are on my last nerve! I followed the nurses orders and have been using Neosporin AROUND the incisions to get rid of this red rashiness. Well I looked at them at my desk today and the port incision now has tiny lil antbite-like bumps around it. Before there were bumps but now they have lil heads on them just like an antbite or tiny pimple. I don't get it??? What in the hell will fix this mess???? It's funny cuz that's what is making my incisions look bad not the incision itself. That's healing just fine but the glue has messed up my skin. I hate to have to wait until Friday when I go for my fill to do something about it because I don't want to scar worse as Sandy Lee said but dang, I don't want to make a special 45 min trip to see them and then have to do it again Friday. UGH!!! Why cruel world why????

Just a sad day for this puppy!

4 comments:

  1. Ahhh...Jess. And people think we've taken the easy way out. You are in bandster HELL. This is so common that it has its own name. You need a fill, girl. That's all! Hang in there. Friday is just around the corner.

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  2. You won't scar in 4 days. That would only happen if it was terribly infected, oozing and super red. Could it be your clothes rubbing on the incisions-my daughter reacted to the laundry detergent/fabric softener I used. I think you could do with a nice soak in the tub and use some mild soap. I'm surprised they didn't tell you to try some cortisone cream. If it isn't too itchy, you can probably wait until Friday.

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  3. My post-op instructions specifically said to not use Neosporin. I had to use polysporin or Bacitration. I'm not sure why. Can you call the office and ask them if you should change what you are using?

    It definitely sounds like bandster hell to me too! They say the first 4 weeks is for healing, not losing so don't beat yourself up! I have to wait 6 weeks for my first fill so just think about me and you'll feel better knowing you are getting your fill in 4 weeks!

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  4. Yes bandster hell is the perfect is the perfect term for this! I mean I honestly didnt think I would fall back into old habits this quickly or easily. I am in it to win it so I must remind myself that this too shall pass...after my fill of course he he!

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